lim

There was a young actress from Crewe,

Who remarked as the vicar withdrew,

"The Bishop was quicker and thicker and slicker,

and two inches longer than you."

There was a young vampire called Mable,

whose periods were always quite stable,

at every full moon she took out a spoon,

and drank herself under the table.

There was a young plumber from Lee,

who was plumbing his girl with great glee,

she said "stop your plumbing, I think someones coming",

said the plumber still plumbing "its me"!

A kinky young girl from Coleshill,

Tried a dynamite stick for a thrill,

They found her vagina, in North Carolina,

and bits of her tits in Brazil.

There was a young man from Pitlocherie,

making love to his girl in the rockery,

She said "look you've cum, all over my bum,

This isn't a shag it's a mockery."

There was a young lassie from Morton,

who had one long tit and one and one short 'un,

on top of all that, a great hairy twat,

and a fart like a six fifty Norton.

There was a young man from Nantucket,

Who's appendage was so long he could suck it,

He was heard to allude, "if I may be so crude,

If my ear was a cunt I could fuck it."

There was a young man from Nave,

Who kept a dead whore in a cave,

He said "I must admit I am a bit of a shit,

But think of the money I save."

There was a man from Leeds,

Who ate a packet of seeds,

Great tufts of grass grew from his arse,

and his balls were covered in weeds.

There was a man from Gleen,

Who invented a fucking machine,

But to his disgust the bloody thing bust,

and crushed his balls to cream.